


doodles, heart eyes, and all the nice things

by thestarsalonecantell



Category: SF9 (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Implied/Referenced Suicide, M/M, jaeyoon laughs a lot, juho is just a shy awkward bby that really likes inseong, pls read beginning notes, sanghyuk is perfect
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 07:05:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,319
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15680433
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thestarsalonecantell/pseuds/thestarsalonecantell
Summary: It just so happened that Sanghyuk’s boyfriend’s friend, having studied in London, was proficient in English, and didn’t mind giving up his time to teach Juho. Well, more fool him, Juho had thought at the time… until said man turned out to be the most beautiful person Juho’s ever seen in his lifetime.alternatively: Sanghyuk insists that Juho learn English from somewhere. Falling for his tutor was never part of the plan.prompt fill!!





	doodles, heart eyes, and all the nice things

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [SF9Prompts](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/SF9Prompts) collection. 



> PLEASE READ   
> There is a reference to suicide!! If you would rather not read that, the part is marked out with ---- so you can skip it if you wish!!!
> 
> This is a prompt fill for Sf9 prompts, and I really really wanted to add something to the zuseong tag! I hope you enjoy, and maybe leave kudos or a comment if you do??
> 
> @thestarsalone on twitter come yell at me there

Juho knows he stares too much- then again, how could he not? It’s hard to look away when your tutor is far more captivating than anything he’s trying to teach.

  
  
  


Sanghyuk had insisted upon these tutoring sessions, saying that “If you’re coming on this trip, I’m filming you for my project, and if I’m filming you, then your English better be damn near  _ perfect _ .” It just so happened that Sanghyuk’s boyfriend’s friend, having studied in London, was proficient in English, and didn’t mind giving up his time to teach Juho. Well, more fool him, Juho had thought at the time… until said man turned out to be the most beautiful person Juho’s ever seen in his lifetime. 

  
  
  


Right now, the man ( _ Inseong _ , he remembers) is looking through a folder that looks worn and definitely not new. They’d sat down at this corner table at the library and gone through introductions only minutes ago (Juho had mumbled for the entirety of his, which probably seemed cold, intimidating, and nothing like the nervous wreck he was) and since then, Inseong has been flipping through the folder in silence. His circular, wire-framed glasses sit somewhat crookedly on his nose, and Juho itches to point it out to him, or worse, take the liberty of reaching out to correct it himself. However, it’s not long before Inseong does it without being prompted, pushing up the sleeve of his baby blue, seemingly fluffy sweater and bringing up a hand to adjust his glasses, before turning his head to look at Juho for the first time since he’d introduced himself.

 

“I brought some of my notes” he waves the folder he’s now holding in one hand, “from when I was studying English. I’ve found and bookmarked some of the pages that are relevant to what you might say on holiday, so if you’d like to copy some stuff down, and then we can practise having a conversation- I’m assuming you have a basic grasp of the language?”

 

“Pretty much.” Juho replies. What he’d been taught in high school hadn’t managed to help him pass his exam, but it had stuck with him into university.

 

“That’s good.” Inseong grins, and Juho blinks twice before receiving the folder that is handed to him and opening his notebook.

  
  


As he writes, Inseong asks him questions. Juho tells him that he’s studying music production, that he’s always enjoyed water skiing, and that he’s hated corn from a very young age. In return, he learns that Inseong is the same age as Youngbin, Sanghyuk’s boyfriend (months older, even- Juho expected him to be younger), that his favourite genre of music is hip hop (also surprising, but Juho rejoices that they have the same taste in music), and that he likes to draw. So much so, in fact, that when Juho has written a whole page of notes, Inseong takes the notebook from him, and to his utmost horror, starts doodling in the margin with his left hand.

 

When he manages to sputter, “What are you doing?” Inseong hands him the notebook back and tells him, “It’ll help you remember.” When Juho takes a careful look, he sees that the small drawings are specific to a certain phrase or paragraph, and Inseong has even added annotations here and there. 

  
  
  


At the end of the session, Inseong asks for his number so that they can schedule the next. Juho wordlessly plucks his phone from his pocket and marvels at Inseong’s fingertips poking out from behind the sleeve of the baby blue sweater as he reaches out to take it, and when their hands brush, he finds out that it is, indeed, fluffy. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


That night, Juho somehow summons up the courage to text Inseong, chuckling to himself at the contact name the elder had chosen.

 

i stand corrected

( _ 20:34 _ )

 

the drawings do help

( _ 20:34 _ )

 

He doesn’t mention that they are also so distracting that Juho could do nothing but stare at them for the first ten minutes of his “revision” time.

 

The response is surprisingly swift.

 

**best teacher inseong**

 

you’re a diligent student, revising already. i must say, im quite surprised ^_^

( _ 20:36 _ )

 

didn’t I tell you they’d work?

( _ 20:37 _ )

 

ever so sorry for doubting you, oh so wise master of revision :P

( _ 20:38 _ )

 

well it got me somewhere, and if i recall, sanghyuk will crucify you if i dont bring your english up to his standard by may? don’t forget i have all the power~

( _ 20:38 _ )

 

Juho lets out a full blown laugh at that, surprised at the ease and comfort that a conversation with Inseong brings, despite having known each other for less than a day. He feels like he could talk for hours on end, something which is rare for him. Although crushing on your tutor may be the most cliche move in history, Juho has a sneaking suspicion that this is what this is, but there’s no harm in seeing where this leads, is there?

 

Putting all thoughts aside, he aims to steer the conversation away from everything to do with English, finding a confidence that he didn’t expect to have.

 

message received loud and clear. however, perhaps i can persuade you to be a more lenient  teacher by giving you good song recommendations?

( _ 20:40 _ )

  
  


perhaps i may allow myself to be persuaded… if our definitions of “good” are similar and you can bring the finest music to the table

( _ 20:40 _ )

  
  


They banter back and forth, trading links to YouTube and SoundCloud as they do so, and by the time they’ve arranged a date (not a date) for the next study session - Inseong at one point states that he won’t acknowledge that Juho has turned up until he’s asked “Where is the nearest hospital?” in English  _ and  _ translated the following answer - Juho’s cheeks hurt from excessive smiling. No matter the outcome, he thinks, getting closer to a person that makes him smile as much as Inseong does, when they’re only communicating through text, could never be a bad thing. 

  
  
  
  
  
  


Their next meeting is at a café, and Inseong is wearing another fluffy sweater, which is a light pink, with sleeves that are again just a little too long. The glasses are gone this time, however, which Juho counts as a small mercy, as he doesn’t know whether he would be so good at controlling himself if they were to be crooked this time around. 

 

When he sits down at the table where the tutor is seated, Inseong doesn’t look up, and Juho is confused for a few seconds before he remembers the message he’d been sent a few days before. He takes a deep breath, trying to remember the words in English. “ _ Where is the- the nearest hospital _ ?” He knows he’s got it right when Inseong smiles up at him, dyed red hair bobbing as he nods his head. Unfortunately, he doesn’t do quite as well with the answer, and by the end of it, Inseong is visibly trying to contain a smile and shaking his head as Juho stutters through an attempt at translation. He thinks it was well worth it, though, for the small laugh Inseong lets out when they lock eyes and Juho makes a face (barely noticeable, or so he’d thought). Of course, the elder then proceeds to explain everything perfectly, telling Juho to write it down as he does so. The rest of the session continues like this, with shy smiles and Juho staring helplessly as Inseong scribbles in his notebook to illustrate a point he’s making.

  
  
  
  
  


It isn’t Sanghyuk that notices the change first, surprisingly; it’s actually Seokwoo. They’re having lunch together, Taeyang and Youngkyun in tow, when Sanghyuk casually asks how his tutoring is going. Juho replies, “Yeah, it’s going fine. Inseong-hyung’s a great teacher- can’t believe none of you introduced us sooner.” He finds himself involuntarily smiling at the table a little bit as he says it. 

 

Seokwoo peers at him curiously. “You’ve only met him a few times, right? Are you sure you’ve not got a crush or something?” He’s asking with a teasing tone, but Juho looks up, tongue-tied, not able to answer him. Seokwoo’s mirthful expression fades, replaced by a coo, like a mother hearing about her teenage son’s first crush. Despite them being the same age, Seokwoo has a peculiar way of making Juho feel small, like a baby that needs mothering- Seokwoo’s ridiculous height only serving to add to the effect . “Oh, you have?” At this, Taeyang perks up from the quiet conversation he’d been having with Youngkyun in the corner, and Sanghyuk, having already been listening, leans forward to rest his head in his hands and study Juho's face carefully. 

 

“That’s cute, I knew you had good taste in men.” Sanghyuk pinches Juho's cheek - hard - and the younger can only pull away when Sanghyuk decides he’s had enough, grimacing and shaking his head a little.

 

“So what if I like him a little?” he mutters. “I’m not as bad as you were, hyung.” 

 

Sanghyuk looks around comically, as if Youngbin were hiding in a corner somewhere. “What Youngbin-hyung doesn’t know won’t hurt him.” Juho smiles, remembering how pathetically obvious Sanghyuk was with his infatuation before they got together. 

 

Taeyang smiles angelically, looking like sunshine as always. “You know he’d find it cute, hyung.” Sanghyuk melts a bit at the cuteness- they all do,  _ especially  _ Youngkyun - and stops complaining that it “was embarrassing, and he would laugh at me!” Nobody mentions that Youngbin had been aware of Sanghyuk’s blatantly obvious affection since the start. Nevertheless, Juho breathes a small sigh of relief that the conversation had been diverted away from him. 

 

That is, until Seokwoo picks up on his expression and starts teasing him all over again.

  
  
  
  


The next time he meets Inseong, knowing that all of their mutual friends (including Youngbin, because Sanghyuk tells him everything) know about his growing - let’s call it  _ appreciation  _ \- he feels decidedly more nervous than he did before. This time, he’s the one wearing a fluffy, oversized sweater, and he hides his hands in the sleeves in an attempt to stop the anxious fidgeting. 

 

Inseong must realise that something’s wrong, because about half an hour in, he stops mid-sentence and looks at Juho, inquisitive. The eye contact only makes things worse, because who knew that a person’s eyes could be so mesmerising? When Juho turns his head after a few seconds, Inseong makes a soft sound, like he’s got Juho all sussed out - the latter sincerely hopes that this isn’t the case.

 

“Juho…” He starts to speak, softly. Juho tears his eyes from his hands, fidgeting despite his best efforts, and looks at him again. “Are you scared? Of me?” For a second, Juho contemplates lying, but something within him compels him to tell the truth. So he sighs, and admits, “More... nervous, I guess.” The guilty look on Inseong’s face tells him that he’s taken it the wrong way, so he says, “Not- not in a bad way.” before inwardly cursing himself for his idiocy and looking away again. 

 

That’s it, the game’s up- he’s given himself away. The elder must now be aware of how Juho feels, seeing as he’s inadvertently laid it all out so that Inseong can easily piece it together. Holding his breath, Juho looks up, and Inseong’s still staring at him… before he hums to himself and continues his ever-constant writing in Juho's notebook. Maybe, if Juho looks close enough, he could see a hint of a shy smile on his face. 

 

He doesn’t know how to feel about that, being aware that in all likelihood, the object of his affections knows everything, but is choosing to say and do nothing about it. At least he feels more comfortable; now he can pay attention to Inseong reminding him that English is an awful language and most things aren’t pronounced the way they’re read. 

  
  
  


When he tells Youngbin later, his friend sits there and laughs. “Of course he knows, if you’re going to be as obvious as that… Fine, fine, I won’t talk to him about it.” 

  
  
  
  


**best teacher inseong**

can’t wait to see you next time!!

( _ 19:53 _ )

  
  
  


Juho definitely doesn’t spend hours trying to figure out what that means.

  
  
  
  
  


The next few times they meet, Inseong doesn’t mention what happened at all. Instead, his smiles get brighter and he talks a lot more; in turn, Juho falls even more for the way his face lights up when he’s passionate about something, for his evident love of food, for the doodles that keep appearing in his notebook. He no longer feels nervous around him, just pleasantly comfortable, and his English actually does improve a lot, which is only a bonus at this point. When he thanks Sanghyuk for introducing him to Inseong, the elder scoffs. “You can pursue your romantic interest all you want, but if your English isn’t up to scratch, I’ll give Chanhee your plane ticket.” When Juho protests that he paid for the ticket with his own hard-earned money, and Chanhee has his  _ own _ ticket, Sanghyuk shuts him up with a look. 

  
  


He sends Inseong a rough version of the song that’s going to become part of his coursework, and Inseong replies that it’s “absolutely amazing, you’re a great rapper and the song is great!!” Juho is thankful that the elder can’t see his blush over the phone. 

  
  


i’m glad you like it :)

( _ 20:48 _ )

  
  


how could i not? you really are talented ^_^ any inspiration for the lyrics?

( _ 20:50 _ )

  
  


Juho thinks about it: the song speaks of making memories, of smiles and being free, of being in love with someone that loves you. 

  
  


it’s just about what i want for myself in the future, i guess 

( _ 20:51 _ )

  
  
  
  


\-----

 

When they meet for the following session, it is obvious that something is very, very wrong. Inseong is half-asleep, has been since he sat down at the table, and by the seventh time Juho has to repeat himself, it’s clear that he’s in no fit state to teach. When Juho finally asks if everything’s okay, he has to say it three times, wondering if he’s being too nosy, before Inseong answers. 

 

“I…” he sighs. “I volunteer at a suicide hotline.” Juho nods- it does seem like something Inseong would do, trying his best to help people. “Last night, I was on the phone until 4am, and- I couldn’t - couldn’t manage to convince him that -” He breaks his sentence off, biting his lip. “It was a rough night.”

 

Juho moves on autopilot, and before he knows it, he’s moved to the other side of the booth, next to Inseong. “Get some rest.” he says to the elder, who barely registers his presence next to him. “You can- lean on me. If you want.”

 

At this, Inseong’s head drops onto his shoulder, soft hair tickling his chin. Juho longs to rest his cheek on his head, to put an arm around his waist and draw him closer… but that would be too  _ domestic _ , too far removed from what this is: offering comfort to someone who went through something that many could not even begin to imagine. The most he does, that he allows himself to do, is turn and murmur into the top of Inseong’s head, “Sometimes you can’t help everyone.” in the hope that it will provide some small amount of reassurance. 

 

\----

 

A few minutes go by, in which Juho thinks Inseong has fallen asleep, until the latter mumbles, “You’re a big softie really, aren’t you?” Juho looks down at him, wide-eyed, but he carries on. “I thought you were kind of cold at first, but you’re not at all. It’s nice.” When he’s finished speaking, he moves closer to Juho, whose side burns red hot where they’re now touching, just as his shoulder does. 

 

When a waitress arrives, asking them to order or leave, Inseong  _ is  _ asleep, and Juho doesn’t want to wake him up just yet, so he orders and pays for two lattes and a slice of cake for when Inseong wakes up.

 

It’s half an hour later when Inseong finally wakes- Juho has covered the coffee and cake with napkins in the hope that they stay nice. Inseong doesn’t seem to have any problems, becoming visibly more awake after he’s finished. When he thanks Juho and offers to pay him back, the younger man shakes his head. “I don’t mind.”

 

“Sorry I wasn’t able to teach you much.” Inseong apologises bashfully, trying to fix his hair- his efforts are fruitless. 

 

“I don’t mind that either.” Juho admits, knowing that this is a blatant confession of  _ I just like spending time with you _ , but Inseong smiles beautifully, and he thinks that he can live with it as he smiles back. 

  
  
  
  
  
  
  


After that, they get even closer, and Juho thinks that he might even summon the courage to ask Inseong on a date. That is, until he meets Jaeyoon. 

 

Jaeyoon, the funny, friendly guy that’s older than Juho, that smiles at him and gives him a hug when Inseong introduces them. He’s kind to Juho right from the off, and Juho doesn’t have a word to say against him, really. 

 

Other than that he interlocks his fingers with Inseong and swings their joined hands without a care in the world, that he plays with Inseong’s fluffy red hair while Inseong’s talking to Juho, and that he puckers his lips and leans in to kiss Inseong’s cheek before the latter bats him away with a giggle.

 

Juho decides that he doesn’t like Jaeyoon- but deep down, he knows that what he  _ really  _ doesn’t like is that his crush-that-is-becoming-more-than-a-crush has a boyfriend. So he does what he knows he can do best, and isolates himself, telling Inseong that they can’t meet for a few weeks because he’ll be “busy”. 

  
  


**best teacher inseong**

 

running errands again today?? 

( _ 17:44 _ )

  
  


yeah, sorry hyung ://

( _ 17:46 _ ) 

 

how about we meet tomorrow then? it’d be nice to see you

( _ 17:46 _ )

 

i have to work on my coursework, maybe another time

( _ 17:47 _ )

 

:((( let me know when you’re not busy… your english might get bad, and we can’t have that :P

( _ 17:47 _ )

  
  


Seokwoo gently tells him he’s a “complete idiot” for avoiding human contact. After the third day of Juho not wanting to see anyone, he comes around uninvited. “Whatever this is, you’d better get over it, and fast.”

 

Juho scrunches his face up at him. “Easy for you to say, you’ve got no problems because you have Chanhee hanging on your every word. Must be nice having nothing  _ to  _ get over.” He huffs dramatically.

 

“Oh so it  _ is _ about your love life?” Juho's only gone and given himself away- again. “What happened with Inseong-hyung?” Seokwoo’s voice is even softer now, comforting. Juho doesn’t reply, but he’s pulled into a hug anyway. Sometimes, he admits to himself, it’s nice to have friends around to support and cuddle you when you need it. He rests his head on Seokwoo’s shoulder, hoping that the gesture is enough to let the other know that he’s grateful for his presence.

 

He is somewhat less grateful when Sanghyuk and Youngbin turn up the next day demanding to know everything that’s gone on, having been told by Seokwoo that he’s in a “crisis of the romantic kind”. Although he tells them nothing, he accepts the junk food and DVDs they’ve brought by the armful and allows them to sandwich him between them on the sofa as they all watch rubbish films together. Youngbin ruffles his hair a few times in what Juho thinks may be an indication of support, and Sanghyuk is even clingier than normal. 

 

Taeyang and the kids allow him personal space at the very least, but even they bombard him with messages telling him that they hope he feels better soon.

  
  


**best teacher inseong**

 

sanghyuk told me you’re going through some stuff at the moment… im here if you ever want to talk and ill always listen 

( _ 16:23 _ )

 

i care about you a lot, yknow

( _ 16:42 _ )

  
  


Juho leaves him on read, not knowing how to reply to that as he feels his heart breaking a little.  

  
  
  
  


After a while, he decides that he can’t afford to be dramatic any longer for the sake of his work, and he heads out to the library- he can’t quite face seeing Inseong yet, but he figures that doing some English revision by himself would be helpful, and keep Sanghyuk off his case. 

 

When he’s there, he hears a familiar voice call out his name, followed by lots of shushing by other library-goers, and a whispered, “Sorry!” He turns to see Sanghyuk waving him over… with Jaeyoon sat opposite him. He contemplates not going over to them, but Jaeyoon is smiling at him and and Sanghyuk’s expression leaves no room for argument. So he sits down with them, smiling to himself when he notices that Sanghyuk’s books are closed, and look like they have been for a long time. Jaeyoon says hi briefly and then resumes his conversation with Sanghyuk. 

 

“... he’d noticed that I’ve been working out and said I looked better than my profile picture, so I gave him bonus points for that, but he’s a little boring, and the whole time we were eating dinner, he was talking about his ‘crazy’ ex-girlfriend- to be honest, I always think people I meet on dating apps will end up dodgy. What do you think? Should I give him a second date?” He turns to Juho as he asks, and Juho shakes his head, in confusion more than anything. Sanghyuk says, “I agree, the whole thing’s throwing up warning signs to me...” but he’s barely aware of it- surely he can’t be talking about Inseong?

 

He blurts out exactly what he’s thinking. “I thought you were dating Inseong-hyung?”

 

Jaeyoon stares at him, mouth open… before he bursts out laughing. “God, no,” he manages to get out between his giggles, “I love him to bits, but not like  _ that _ !” Juho still can’t comprehend the situation, but Sanghyuk helpfully smacks him on the back of the head. 

 

“Do you really think we’d all support your crush on Inseong-hyung if he was in a relationship?” he scolds. Then his expression changes as another thing seems to dawn on him. “Is  _ that  _ why you stayed in your flat for a whole week? We felt  _ sorry  _ for you, you absolute nitwit.” He sighs, and shakes his head, but a chuckle escapes him. 

 

Jaeyoon wipes tears from his eyes, still laughing. “If it helps, you’re not the first to assume that,” he says, trying to be sympathetic, but it’s hard to take him seriously when he’s still clutching his stomach and trying to catch his breath, “but it’s so funny- that this is why hyung thought you’d got cold feet- he’s been so  _ worried- _ ” He dissolves into further peals of laughter.

 

Juho takes a second to fully process that Inseong  _ hasn’t  _ got a boyfriend, just an over-affectionate best friend, and when he’s sorted it out in his mind, comes out with an eloquent, “Oh.” Considering the way Jaeyoon’s still laughing, and Sanghyuk’s big mouth which will lead to all of his friends knowing about this, he’ll  _ never  _ live this down. However, he can’t even bring himself to care about that- Inseong’s single, and he still has a chance. If he hasn’t completely blown it with his theatrics, that is.

 

When he starts paying attention to the conversation again, Sanghyuk is talking about inviting Jaeyoon and Inseong on the trip, which sounds like a great idea. Then Sanghyuk addresses him, saying, “You don’t need to learn English anymore then.”

 

“What? Why?” Juho asks, before composing himself. “I mean, what changed your mind?”

 

“Well, I’ll have a fluent English speaker to film, so you’re out of the limelight for anything other than standing around and looking pretty. I thought you’d be pleased?” There’s a glint in Sanghyuk’s eye that Juho doesn’t like the look of. 

 

Jaeyoon evidently catches on, grinning somewhat evilly. “Of course,” he drawls, “that means your one-to-one sessions with Inseongie-hyung will come to an end, so if you want to keep seeing him-”

“You’ll have to stop being a coward and ask him out.” Sanghyuk shrugs his shoulders, now looking like butter wouldn’t melt in his mouth. 

 

Juho looks from one “innocent” face to the other- they look back, and in the end, it’s Juho who sighs and admits that they’re right.

  
  


hyung, i don’t have to learn english anymore

( _ 18:52 _ )

 

**best teacher inseong**

 

oh that’s good! a shame though, you were making so much progress :// oh well, i can speak english for all of you!!

( _ 18:52 _ )

 

i’ll miss teaching you :(((

( _ 18:53 _ )

  
  


Juho wonders how he can just…  _ say  _ that, without second-guessing himself or deleting the message before he can send it. However, he can’t deny that reading it makes him feel all warm and fuzzy, and he decides to take a risk.

 

i’ll miss being taught

( _ 18:53 _ )

 

He doesn’t stop there.

  
  


sorry for not being able to see you recently

( _ 18:55 _ )

 

it’s fine, you’ve had stuff to do!!

( _ 18:55 _ )

 

besides, id be upset too if i thought you were dating someone :P

( _ 18:5 _ 7)

  
  


Juho almost throws his phone at the wall in mortification before stopping to consider what Inseong had said. He would be upset… does that mean he returns Juho's feelings? His face heating up, he starts typing, faster than he can think. 

 

inseong hyung

( _ 18:58 _ )

 

where are you right now?

( _ 18:58 _ )

 

im studying at the library. why? 

( _ 18:59 _ )

 

Luckily, the library is only a few minutes away, so Juho can drive there fairly quickly, heart racing in his chest as he thinks about what he’s going to do. He tries to calm down and walk slowly once he gets there, in an attempt to let his face cool down and lose the blush that he knows he must have. It’s pointless anyway, because it comes right back when he sees Inseong in the corner, wearing another fluffy sweater with his head bent over his books. He doesn’t notice that Juho's approaching until he’s standing beside the table.

 

“Juho. Hi.” It comes out soft, shy if anything, and the smile that lights up Inseong’s delicate features takes Juho's breath away momentarily. “Sit down.” He does, picking up Inseong’s notebook and studying it. 

 

“It’s just some revision, I want to be perfect by the time we leave-” Juho isn’t paying attention, too busy concentrating on what he’s doing as he picks up a pen from the table and scribbles something. 

 

In the margin, he writes: _ would you go on a date with me?  _ and he draws some smiley faces and a heart for good measure. If his hands tremble as he hands over the notebook, Inseong doesn’t notice, taking it from him and reading it carefully. 

 

A few moments pass, in which Juho panics at the thought that he’s read the whole situation wrong, before Inseong puts the notebook down on the table slowly, carefully… and then he’s surging forward to wrap his arms around Juho, burying his head in the crook of his neck. Juho tentatively reciprocates the hug, the emotion that’s crashing over him making him feel slightly dizzy. This close, he can smell Inseong’s cologne, and this feels so much more intimate than that morning in the café, so much more special. 

 

“That’s so cute,” Inseong whispers, “you’re so cute, how can you be so tall and swag with your deep voice and your nose and still be so  _ cute _ ?” Juho could point out that he doesn’t really think he’s that cute; also, that they’re the same height, but he doesn’t, deciding to instead ask if that means yes.

 

Inseong breaks away at that (Juho misses the contact immediately) and says, “Of  _ course _ that means yes! I’d love to.” 

  
  
  
  


Their first date goes well- and their second, and their third, and it’s not too long before Inseong asks Juho to be his boyfriend, two weeks before they all leave for the United States. Juho says that he can’t think of anything he’d like more, and it’s true; Inseong has made his life better in more ways than he ever imagined. Being able to hold him silently and keep him company after a difficult phone call late at night, playing his music and hearing whatever feedback Inseong has… even just watching him walk out of Juho's bedroom in the morning with messy hair and a yawn, wearing one of Juho's sweaters, can make his entire day. He’d like to think that Inseong feels the same, and he knows, in the moments that Inseong stops doing his volunteer work and seeks comfort in his arms, or reminds him that it’s okay to get some sleep instead of staying up all night trying to get coursework done, that this is the case. When Inseong tilts his head to kiss him, drawing him closer with an unspoken longing, Juho responds in kind, telling him  _ I’m here, and I’m all yours just as you are mine, _ without any words. 

 

Inevitably, their friends come to know about the new developments, and as expected, most roll their eyes and say some variation of “Finally.” Taeyang congratulates them, Chanhee says they’re like a pair of old men, and Jaeyoon laughs- a lot- before giving Juho a “best friend talk” that promises to haunt him until his dying day. The only person that really has anything to say about it is Sanghyuk, who says, “I’m glad you got it all sorted out before the trip, because who knows what I would’ve done if you’d taken all that tension with you to the US?” 

  
  
  


The trip rolls around eventually, a few days after the semester finishes, and when they get on the plane, Inseong shows him a playlist he’d prepared specifically for the journey. They listen together, hands intertwined once they’re sure that none of their friends are awake to tease them. Inseong falls asleep after a while, head resting on Juho's shoulder, and Juho pauses the music, thinking it’s wrong if they don’t listen together, before following his boyfriend into dreamland. 

  
  
  


He tells Inseong he loves him in Manhattan, watching a firework display. Well, he’s watching Inseong watching the firework display, and he looks so beautiful with his face illuminated by the fireworks that it just sort of- slips out. 

 

“I love you.” 

 

Inseong turns to look at him, wide-eyed, and Juho thinks it may have been too soon, but suddenly Inseong’s throwing his arms around his neck and saying, “I love you too,” into his shoulder. 

 

Juho almost forgets that their friends are present until he hears Sanghyuk’s hushed, “Holy shit, I got that on video.” 

  
  
  
  


When they get back, Juho goes back to the song he’d written and produced for his coursework- the one about making memories, about smiles and being free, about being in love with someone that loves you- and he realises that something had been missing. Whilst the song had emotional lyrics, it contained no emotion. 

 

So he changes it, adds and removes parts as he sees fit, until he’s truly happy with the result. When Inseong listens for the second time, he describes it as “more alive”, which Juho thinks is a fitting description. Much like him, so much more alive once Kim Inseong enters the picture. 

 

He tells Inseong that, when they’re both on the sofa reading comics, and the elder laughs. “That’s so sappy.” He puts his legs over Juho's lap. “I like it. But it’s the other way around too,” he says, looking at Juho with a serious expression, “you make me feel more alive than anything else ever could.” 

 

Juho feels the sudden urge to kiss him, and he does. The song can wait, his tutor-turned-boyfriend has always been far more captivating. 


End file.
